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A very Firstones Christmas

David of MacDavid of Mac Elite RangerCa
in Zocalo v2.0
Ha! I bet you thought I forgot (or rather, forgot yourselves).

Anyway, I do believe I've posted this little gem every December for the past few years, so I think its right time for it now. Any other little Holiday gems, post 'em here.

CHRISTMAS SONGS FOR THE MENTALLY DISTURBED

[b][i]SCHIZOPHRENIA:[/b][/i]
Do you hear what I hear?

[b][i]MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER:[/b][/i]
We three Queens disoriented are

[b][i]DEMENTIA:[/b][/i]
I think I'll be home for Christmas

[b][i]NARCISSISTIC:[/b][/i]
Hark the herald angels sing about me

[b][i]MANIC:[/b][/i]
Deck the Halls and wall and house and lawn and streets and stores and office and town and car and buses and trucks and trees and Fire Hydrants and.....

[b][i]PARANOID:[/b][/i]
Santa Claus is coming to get me

[b][i]PERSONALITY DISORDER:[/b][/i]
You better watch out, I'm gonna cry, I'm gonna pout, maybe I'll tell you why

[b][i]DEPRESSION:[/b][/i]
Silent Anhedonia, holy Anhedonia, all is flat, all is lonely.

[b][i]OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER:[/b][/i]
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock,
Jingle bell, Jingle bell, Jingle bell rock...
(better start again)

[b][i]PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY:[/b][/i]
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me (and then took it all away)

[b][i]BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER:[/b][/i]
Thoughts of roasting on an open fire
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Comments

  • Reaver4kReaver4k Trainee in training
    Re: A very Firstones Christmas

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by David of Mac [/i]
    [B]
    [b][i]PARANOID:[/b][/i]
    Santa Claus is coming to get me

    [/B][/QUOTE]

    Dont joke about that man, becuase he is coming to get me, and is going to make me a slave in his sweatshop. He and the RIAA and MPAA Death Squads.
  • Random ChaosRandom Chaos Actually Carefully-selected Order in disguise
    A merry Purple and Green x-mas!
  • A2597A2597 Fanboy
    I'll toast to that,

    Cheers!
  • RhettRhett (Not even a monkey)
    Merry Christmas! Ah yes, I love that song... what a great tradition :)
  • BigglesBiggles <font color=#AAFFAA>The Man Without a Face</font>
    Who can identify every single piece of "kiwiana" in this?


    [b]Kiwi Xmas[/b] - [i]Penny Ashton[/i]


    'Twas the Night before Xmas and all through the bach
    Not even a weta was making a scratch
    Woolly socks were hung by the pot belly with care
    In the hopes that Santa soon would be there
    The children were snoozing in a light summer's breeze
    Whilst dreaming of spongy pud and lime green cream freeze
    And dad in his walk shorts and me in my Jandals
    Had just settled down for a couple of handles
    When out on the lawn I heard such a ruckus
    I sprang from my Lazy Boy to see what the fuss was
    I ran to the sliding door, gasping and wheezing
    Threw open the curtains and upped the venetians
    The moon on the sand and the Trailer tarp
    Lit the beach up just like Eden Park
    But still when I saw, I thought I was asleep
    A miniature Kingswood, pulled by eight tiny sheep
    With a little old driver, sipping a Fanta
    I knew in a moment, it had to be Santa
    Faster than Phar Lap on steroids they came
    And he coo-eed and shouted and called them by name
    Now, Kevin! Now, Sharlene! Now, Rangi and Beck!
    On, Darryl! On Shazza! On, Bilbo and Shrek!
    To the top of the Pagoda, to the top of the wall
    Get in behind, Get in behind, Get in behind, all!
    As sandflies around a bar-b-que fly
    When they sniff the sizzlers and take to the sky
    So up to the top of the bach they flew
    With a boot full of toys and Santa Claus too
    With a handbrake stop, they arrived on the roof
    Four Goodyear tyres and 32 hoofs
    And as I quickly turned and ran to the lounge
    Out from the chimney Santa came with a bound
    He was wearing boardshorts, and gumboots on foot
    And his Mambos were covered in six-month-old soot
    A bundle of toys he had on his back
    As if on OE with a brand new Macpac
    He looked like he'd come from the beauty parlour
    With rosy red cheeks like pohutukawa
    A gorgeous big grin and white as white hair
    With wee little tufts growing out of his ears
    He had a broad chest and a round beer gut
    That shook when he laughed like Jabba the Hutt
    He was chubby and plump, a right jolly hobbit
    And I laughed when I saw him, I couldn't stop it
    He gave me a wink and a bonza thumbs up
    And I quickly realised he wasn't a nut
    He went straight to the socks without saying a thing
    And filled them with barbies and Shrek 2 keyrings
    Then giving his nose a jolly good scratch
    He flew up the chimney with an almighty flash
    He jumped in the Kingswood and cranked the ignition
    And then they took off, like some Nasa mission
    But I think I could hear, as he drove out of sight
    "Merry Christmas to all, have a bloody good night!"
  • NovaCameronNovaCameron Earthforce Officer
    Nice songs! Merry Christmas everybody! :D :D :D

    :shadow1:
  • Reaver4kReaver4k Trainee in training
    It's Christmas at ground zero
    There's music in the air
    The sleigh bells are ringing and the carolers are singing
    While the air raid sirens blare

    It's Christmas at ground zero
    The button has been pressed
    The radio just let us know
    That this is not a test

    Everywhere the atom bombs are dropping
    It's the end of all humanity
    No more time for last-minute shopping
    It's time to face your final destiny

    It's Christmas at ground zero
    There's panic in the crowd
    We can dodge debris while we trim the tree
    Underneath the mushroom cloud

    You might hear some reindeer on your rooftop
    Or Jack Frost on your windowsill
    But if someone's climbing down your chimney
    You better load your gun and shoot to kill

    It's Christmas at ground zero
    And if the radiation level's okay
    I'll go out with you and see all the new
    Mutations on New Year's Day

    It's Christmas at ground zero
    Just seconds left to go
    I'll duck and cover with my Yuletide lover
    Underneath the mistletoe

    It's Christmas at ground zero
    Now the missiles are on their way
    What a crazy fluke, we're gonna get nuked
    On this jolly holiday
  • NovaCameronNovaCameron Earthforce Officer
    YAY! Nukes! I go for gravitonic and warp warheads but fission and fusion bombs will do nicely! :D

    :shadow1:
  • C_MonC_Mon A Genuine Sucker
    MEeeeeeerrryy Christmas!
  • Lord RefaLord Refa Creepy, but in a good way
    Bah!!!

    Humbug!:mad:
  • ShadowDancerShadowDancer When I say, "Why aye, gadgie," in my heart I say, "Och aye, laddie." London, UK
    Merry Christmas from Scotland:)
  • shadow boxershadow boxer The Finger Painter & Master Ranter
    Merry Christmas or equivalent annual celebratory hoohar !

    I loves youse guys.... *snif*

    *passes around the 400 proof egg-nogg*
  • EclecticonautEclecticonaut Elite Ranger
    Here's my [url=http://txc.net.au/~mapie/hohoho.exe]traditional way[/url] of wishing merry christmas.
  • MessiahMessiah Failed Experiment
    I just travelled halfway through Sweden to celebrate Winter Solstice and Jul with my family. (Ok so winter Solstice was a couple of days ago). In [URL=http://www.dalarna.se/]Dalarna[/URL] it was snowing, and here the wind is blowing, but no snow, just rain.

    Anyway, merry Jul, Christmas, Hanukka or what ever you celebrate :)

    Education (Why is christmas January 7th in Russia, and when was Jesus really born?):
    [url]http://www.cityvision2000.com/millenium/feature.htm[/url]
    [url]http://www.rumela.com/events/christmas_index.htm[/url]
  • the_exilethe_exile Kupo!
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Eclecticonaut [/i]
    [B]Here's my [url=http://txc.net.au/~mapie/hohoho.exe]traditional way[/url] of wishing merry christmas. [/B][/QUOTE]:D

    Merry Christmas.
  • E.TE.T Quote-o-matic
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Reaver4k [/i]
    [B]It's Christmas at ground zero...[/B][/QUOTE]
    Exactly what I had in my mind! [img]http://forums.firstones.com/images/oldicons/icon14.gif[/img]


    White Christmas for everyone...
    and -15 C temperature so that there isn't hot if you have to do something outside. :D
    [url=http://koti.mbnet.fi/~tuunaes/Images/christmas.jpg][img]http://koti.mbnet.fi/~tuunaes/Images/christmas_s.jpg[/img][/url]
  • PJHPJH The Lovely Thing
    *Vorklift arrives*
    [size=3][color=red][b]Merry Christmas from Aardvarkia! [/b][/color][/size][img]http://personal.inet.fi/private/aardfather/Misc/xmashat_smile.gif[/img]

    *Vorklift departs*

    - PJH, The Aardfather

    [img]http://personal.inet.fi/private/aardfather/Misc/xmas_aardvark.jpg[/img]
  • Lord RefaLord Refa Creepy, but in a good way
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by PJH [/i]
    [B]*Vorklift arrives*
    [size=3][color=red][b]Merry Christmas from Aardvarkia! [/b][/color][/size][img]http://personal.inet.fi/private/aardfather/Misc/xmashat_smile.gif[/img]

    *Vorklift departs*

    - PJH, The Aardfather

    [img]http://personal.inet.fi/private/aardfather/Misc/xmas_aardvark.jpg[/img] [/B][/QUOTE]

    I think there's something wrong with that colour...
  • Random ChaosRandom Chaos Actually Carefully-selected Order in disguise
    Yes. Something definately wrong with that color. The tree I made didn't have just purple...so why should yours have just the enemy?
  • Alpha-1Alpha-1 Elite Ranger Germany
    marry christmas to all of you

    have a picture of our christmas tree atached :)

    show yours too ;)
  • wiseguywiseguy Playa
    remember, if you dont get any presents, this might be the reason:

    [IMG]http://strvang.ath.cx/~andi/temp/images/santa.jpg[/IMG]
  • ShadowDancerShadowDancer When I say, "Why aye, gadgie," in my heart I say, "Och aye, laddie." London, UK
    lol! i dont think my little cousins would appreciate the joke:D
  • The Cabl3 GuyThe Cabl3 Guy Elite Ranger
    Bah Fucking Humbug!
  • A2597A2597 Fanboy
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Random Chaos [/i]
    [B]Yes. Something definately wrong with that color. The tree I made didn't have just purple...so why should yours have just the enemy? [/B][/QUOTE]

    because thats the Great Green Aardvark.

    Obviously from before your time. Anyone care to explain in full about the great green aardvark anyone? I think this used to be Sam's area...
  • Reaver4kReaver4k Trainee in training
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by The Cabl3 Guy [/i]
    [B]Bah Fucking Humbug! [/B][/QUOTE]

    I secand that.
  • DarkbladeDarkblade Earthforce Officer
    Merry Christmas everyone.

    I wish that I would have had a present for all of you but I'm all out of juice after that ItF music release.
  • Random ChaosRandom Chaos Actually Carefully-selected Order in disguise
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by A2597 [/i]
    [B]because thats the Great Green Aardvark.

    Obviously from before your time. Anyone care to explain in full about the great green aardvark anyone? I think this used to be Sam's area... [/B][/QUOTE]

    I am quite familiar with the great overgrown dumb aardvark. We purples just don't recognize his legitamacy. :p
  • BigglesBiggles <font color=#AAFFAA>The Man Without a Face</font>
    Take it to the Warleader forum, guys. :)



    [url]http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=04/12/24/1847259&from=rss[/url]
  • Lord RefaLord Refa Creepy, but in a good way
    Does it make me deviant when I dont choose sides on this one? purple.. green.. in the end.. it's all same to me.

    Cuz Starscream lost his eyes. :(

    Damn those pesky non-sticky stickers and my nuclear holocaust like room. They're gone.. Gone forever! :indymad:
  • Reaver4kReaver4k Trainee in training
    [img]http://uploads.savefile.com/users/uploads/asuka101_000.jpg[/img]
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