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Jake's Guide to All Star Trek Shows

FreejackFreejack Jake the Not-so-Wise
Its official, I have completed my official guide to all Star Trek shows. Once read you will be able to quickly ascertain the type, plot and outcome of any Star Trek episode.

Episode Type I

Plot:
Crew meets new alien race
Race seems peaceful and intelligent and has great technology
Moral or technological problem arises
Crew solves problem, often breaking prime directive

Episode Type II

Plot:
Crew meets bad-ass alien race
Ship and/or crew get the snot beat out of them, almost to the verge of destruction
A massive leap in technology takes place on the spot
Crew escapes through use of new tech.

Episode Type III

Plot:
Crew thinks everything is great
Massive mechanical failure or medical emergency befalls ship and/or crew
A massive leap in technology takes place on the spot
Crew survives through use of new tech.

Episode Type IV

Plot:
Q shows up
Chaos ensues

There you now have a guide to the basic premise of every Star Trek show. If the show you’ve watching does not fit into these scenarios, your probably watch Deep Space 9, which is really a copy of Babylon 5, so quit watching DS9 and go watch B5.

Jake
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Comments

  • hmm...*Tries to think of another catagory*

    AHA! You forgot the political ones!

    Crew meets with known alien race
    Member of crew faces trial
    Member of crew faces death, but with the aid of their ship escapes alive.
  • [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by A2597 [/i]
    [B]hmm...*Tries to think of another catagory*

    AHA! You forgot the political ones! [/B][/QUOTE]

    I've got one;

    A small child turns up and has an emotional/identity crisis, maybe in conjunction with one of the crew, resulting in many other crew members being involved in sorting this child's problem out.

    Jesus, after watching all of Babylon 5 seasons 2-5 recently, I've realized just how [i]predictable[/i] Star Trek is...

    Regards,
    Morden
  • BigglesBiggles <font color=#AAFFAA>The Man Without a Face</font>
    Re: Jake's Guide to All Star Trek Shows

    That is so true.

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Freejack [/i]
    [B]Episode Type IV

    Plot:
    Q shows up
    Chaos ensues[/B][/QUOTE]

    These ones, at least, were entertaining. Well, the TNG ones were. The Voyager ones sucked.
  • Re: Re: Jake's Guide to All Star Trek Shows

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Biggles [/i]
    [B]These ones, at least, were entertaining. Well, the TNG ones were. The Voyager ones sucked. [/B][/QUOTE]

    Hold on, let my get my scissors...

    *Snip Snip Snip*

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Biggles [/i]
    [B]Voyager sucked. [/B][/QUOTE]

    There you go. :)

    Regards,
    Morden
  • OmegaPaladinOmegaPaladin Earthforce Officer
    Re: Jake's Guide to All Star Trek Shows

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Freejack [/i]
    [B]There you now have a guide to the basic premise of every Star Trek show. If the show you’ve watching does not fit into these scenarios, your probably watch Deep Space 9, which is really a copy of Babylon 5, so quit watching DS9 and go watch B5.

    Jake [/B][/QUOTE]

    Not quite.

    The Shadows were so UNlike the Dominion it's funny. The Shadow War was so diferent from the Dominion War that I cannot fathom how one could connect them.

    The crew was not a mirror image of B5's, and the relation between the station and the planet were MUCH different.
  • It's a Morden-esque cut and paste version of B5. Like those refrigerator magnets with words on them. B5 was "The Best Show Ever," and DS9 was "Best Ever The Show."
  • OmegaPaladinOmegaPaladin Earthforce Officer
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by the_exile [/i]
    [B]It's a Morden-esque cut and paste version of B5. Like those refrigerator magnets with words on them. B5 was "The Best Show Ever," and DS9 was "Best Ever The Show." [/B][/QUOTE]

    It's at a station. The Defiant looks like a WS. The captain barely escaped death in a massive battle with a conquering race. (although in a much much different fashion) It featured two races who despised each other.

    It's not a ripoff of B5 just because it was also good.
  • Best Ever The Show still has a ring to it...
  • BigglesBiggles <font color=#AAFFAA>The Man Without a Face</font>
    Re: Re: Re: Jake's Guide to All Star Trek Shows

    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Morden279 [/i]
    [B]Hold on, let my get my scissors...

    *Snip Snip Snip*


    There you go. :)

    Regards,
    Morden [/B][/QUOTE]

    Yeah, that too. :)
  • FreejackFreejack Jake the Not-so-Wise
    Ok, Ok I will admit I liked DS9 also. Fortunately the station didn't move, so they had to come up with new plot points to create a story. Also each episode was not a microcosim like Voyager turned out to be.

    Jake
  • MessiahMessiah Failed Experiment
    Well...

    Apart from the obvious likenesses like being in a station near a vortex of some sorts close to a planet that is not earth...

    G'kar = Kira : Resistance fighters in a species conquered and enslaved by another.

    Londo = Gul Dukat : Emissary of the species that conquered the former characters world. Eventually rises to command his species.

    Sheridan = Sisko : Dies and lives again. Very close to a god like species.

    shall I go on?
  • WHYWHY Elite Ranger
    Hmm.. Suppose you're part of that group who thought Tom Clancy's "The Bear and the Dragon" was a direct ripoff of "Endgame"...
  • MessiahMessiah Failed Experiment
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by WHY [/i]
    [B]"The Bear and the Dragon"[/B][/QUOTE]

    Never heard of it...
  • [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Messiah [/i]
    [B]Well...

    Apart from the obvious likenesses like being in a station near a vortex of some sorts close to a planet that is not earth...

    G'kar = Kira : Resistance fighters in a species conquered and enslaved by another.

    Londo = Gul Dukat : Emissary of the species that conquered the former characters world. Eventually rises to command his species.

    Sheridan = Sisko : Dies and lives again. Very close to a god like species.

    shall I go on? [/B][/QUOTE]

    You don't have to, those are more than co-incidence; especially Sisko.

    It's a shame; out of all of the Star Trek series, DS9 was my favorite; it featured the best stories, action, and plotlines. Now I know why.

    Regards,
    Morden
  • David of MacDavid of Mac Elite Ranger Ca
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by WHY [/i]
    [B]Hmm.. Suppose you're part of that group who thought Tom Clancy's "The Bear and the Dragon" was a direct ripoff of "Endgame"... [/B][/QUOTE]

    Which one, Voyager's, B5's, or a third? 'Cause I really don't see it with the first two.

    By the way, Jack Ryan is da man.
  • WHYWHY Elite Ranger
    Apparently it was a ripoff of B5's Endgame :rolleyes:
  • [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by David of Mac [/i]
    [B]By the way, Jack Ryan is da man. [/B][/QUOTE]

    Really? I prefer Shane Schofield. ;)

    Regards,
    Morden
  • WORFWORF The Burninator
    Jack...Bauer

    Of course that isnt Tom Clancy.

    Worf
  • [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by WORF [/i]
    [B]Jack...Bauer[/B][/QUOTE]

    I must admit, Jack Bauer's the f*cking don. ;)

    Regards,
    Morden
  • Jack Bauer for President!!!!!
  • TOS = good, it was original!

    TNG = Good, less original, but still good

    DSN = S1 good, after that I stopped watching, S2 sucked

    Voyager = horrid....

    Enterprise = Rock on. :)
  • BekennBekenn Sinclair's Duck
    A#, you stopped watching DS9 at exactly the wrong time. See if you can catch some reruns; hopefully, you'll see what I mean.
  • SanfamSanfam I like clocks.
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Morden279 [/i]
    [B]You don't have to, those are more than co-incidence; especially Sisko.

    It's a shame; out of all of the Star Trek series, DS9 was my favorite; it featured the best stories, action, and plotlines. Now I know why.

    Regards,
    Morden [/B][/QUOTE]

    But do the similarities really matter? Something I've noticed is that B5 and DS9 did indeed have similar elements, many of which could easily have been stolen from one another, but, what made them great was the fact that they both focused on honest to goodness character development and telling a story as best as it damn well could be told.

    It worked, and it ruled.

    Plus, DS9 had Dax. *drool*
  • WORFWORF The Burninator
    *gives sanfam a bucket* We've told you about this...

    ;)

    Worf
  • so S3 got good? heh
  • I like the part where in the book they storm the house with MP10s and blow everyone's heads off with 3 perfect shots.
  • FreejackFreejack Jake the Not-so-Wise
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sanfam [/i]
    [B]But do the similarities really matter? Something I've noticed is that B5 and DS9 did indeed have similar elements, many of which could easily have been stolen from one another, but, what made them great was the fact that they both focused on honest to goodness character development and telling a story as best as it damn well could be told.
    [/B][/QUOTE]

    I think part of the focus on charater and story development came, out of neccessity from the basic fact that the station was just that, stationary. They couldn't go find a new race or go find trouble for themselves each week (like Voyager). They also couldn't rely so much on tech to get them by.

    Jake
  • [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by the_exile [/i]
    [B]I like the part where in the book they storm the house with MP10s and blow everyone's heads off with 3 perfect shots. [/B][/QUOTE]

    Mmm... Mp10s... Teflon-coated 10mm jacketted hollow-points anyone? :D

    Regards,
    Morden
  • BigglesBiggles <font color=#AAFFAA>The Man Without a Face</font>
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Freejack [/i]
    [B]I think part of the focus on charater and story development came, out of neccessity from the basic fact that the station was just that, stationary. They couldn't go find a new race or go find trouble for themselves each week (like Voyager). They also couldn't rely so much on tech to get them by.

    Jake [/B][/QUOTE]

    I agree. It's such a pity that they went so far in the opposite direction with Voyager.
  • BekennBekenn Sinclair's Duck
    [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by A2597 [/i]
    [B]so S3 got good? heh [/B][/QUOTE]

    Yep! That's where all the big stuff starts happening, and it just gets better from there.
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