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How Wolverine got taller.. (from superherohype.com)
Lord Refa
Creepy, but in a good way
in Zocalo v2.0
sebita
SUPERHERO
Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Posts: 128
How Wolverine Got Taller...
I was a day like any other at the X-Mansion. Wolverine had just gotten from his and Cyclops first fight with Cassandra Nova and was feeling a little upset.
"Damn it! I'm always shorter than our foes! Only Toad's smaller than me..."
That wasn't the only disadvantage of being a midget. Everytime he wanted to kiss Jean he had to climb up a stool. Also when he told people that Hugh Jackman played as him they always say "but he's so tall..."
Yes, poor Wolverine. The best there is at what he does was tired of being a short midget. He wanted all of that to change. When everyone was sleeping he silently walked to the comm room and dialed a very special number...
"Avengers Mansion, this is Jarvis speaking..."
"Oh great the Buttler" Wolverine thought "Listen bub, I need to speak with Giant-Man, I have a very urgent problem."
"Do you require the aid of the entire Avengers team? Are the X-Men in trouble, sir?"
"No! DOn't say a word about that! Just bring him!"
Wolverine waitd for a while, tweedling his thumbs, until a very tired, leather-wearing, bruised, Hank Pym sat in front of the Computer
"Wolverine, what's up man? Hurry up, Jan's in her dominatrix outfit and she gets cranky if I make her wait..."
"Look Pym I need your help... can you send me those--- growth pills?"
"Viagra? I dont--who have you been talking to?"
"No!No! I mean those Pym particles you use to grow..."
"Ah! Thank god... not that I use Viagra or anything but-- why do you need them?"
A Light turns on around Wolverine as he puts a puppy face...
"It's just... I'm tired of being small..."
"AWwwwwwwww poor little Wolverine. I'll help you! I'll send you some, go to sleep now, you will receive them in your mail from 6 to 8 weeks."
And 6 to 8 weeks later....
"The mail's here!!" Iceman shouts as he ice-slides his way into the mansion. Packages begin to fly and Wolverine picks up his package. He cannot hide the joy in his face as he runs towards the nearest bathroom, anxious to test these pills...
"Holy sh-- What's this??" Wolverine looks surprised at the impressive cylinder labeled Pym particle. It looks like an enlarged cucumber... He grabs the instructions and reads
"This pill will make you grow a couple of feet! Surprise your friends! Amaze your girl! WARNING: DO not cut the particle! It could severely harm the timestream and create a different reality where you are a dwarf called Gimli..."
"What the fu-- how am I supposed to swallow such a pill??"
But Wolverine forgot to read the bottom line of the instructions and as he did so his heart filled with sorrow...
"Not to be taken orally..."
A tear fell from the canucklehead's eye as he read that line and realized what he had to do...
Ouside the bathroom Jean Grey walks by, accompanied by Emma Frost.
"Why are you such a ***** Emma?"
"Who knows! Gamma rays maybe?"
But the girls' chat is ended by a painful scream coming from the bathroom
" AAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAROOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOY IT HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS"
JEan Grey recognizes the scream
"Logan! Is someone attacking you??"
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
WWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNO
OOOOOOOOOOOO!!!DOOO'NNNNNNNT GETTTTTTTTT INNNNNNNNN!!!"
"Ok"
Jean and Emma walk away.
Two days later Wolverine looks taller, yet no one seems to realize, although they seem to realize that he refuses to sit at meals or at any time saying "I'm the best bub, I don't need to sit!" While he carefully rubs his butt.
He kisses Jean now, and she doesn't see that he's not standing up a stool anymore... maybe being tall isn't all that is craked up to be.
And that my friends is why Wolverine looks taller since New X-Men 117
__________________
Sebita
Believe in the x The Clubhouse for Gifted Youngsters
The Great Universe
In the Name of Xavier
------------------
"Are you a god fearing man, senator? It's such an strange phrase. I've always though of god as a teacher... as a bringer of light, wisdom and understanding. You see, i think what you really are afraid of is me. Me and my kind, the Brotherhood of Mutants. Oh, it's not so suprising really, mankind has always feared what it doesnt understand. Well, dont fear god senator, and certainly dont fear me... not anymore."
SUPERHERO
Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Posts: 128
How Wolverine Got Taller...
I was a day like any other at the X-Mansion. Wolverine had just gotten from his and Cyclops first fight with Cassandra Nova and was feeling a little upset.
"Damn it! I'm always shorter than our foes! Only Toad's smaller than me..."
That wasn't the only disadvantage of being a midget. Everytime he wanted to kiss Jean he had to climb up a stool. Also when he told people that Hugh Jackman played as him they always say "but he's so tall..."
Yes, poor Wolverine. The best there is at what he does was tired of being a short midget. He wanted all of that to change. When everyone was sleeping he silently walked to the comm room and dialed a very special number...
"Avengers Mansion, this is Jarvis speaking..."
"Oh great the Buttler" Wolverine thought "Listen bub, I need to speak with Giant-Man, I have a very urgent problem."
"Do you require the aid of the entire Avengers team? Are the X-Men in trouble, sir?"
"No! DOn't say a word about that! Just bring him!"
Wolverine waitd for a while, tweedling his thumbs, until a very tired, leather-wearing, bruised, Hank Pym sat in front of the Computer
"Wolverine, what's up man? Hurry up, Jan's in her dominatrix outfit and she gets cranky if I make her wait..."
"Look Pym I need your help... can you send me those--- growth pills?"
"Viagra? I dont--who have you been talking to?"
"No!No! I mean those Pym particles you use to grow..."
"Ah! Thank god... not that I use Viagra or anything but-- why do you need them?"
A Light turns on around Wolverine as he puts a puppy face...
"It's just... I'm tired of being small..."
"AWwwwwwwww poor little Wolverine. I'll help you! I'll send you some, go to sleep now, you will receive them in your mail from 6 to 8 weeks."
And 6 to 8 weeks later....
"The mail's here!!" Iceman shouts as he ice-slides his way into the mansion. Packages begin to fly and Wolverine picks up his package. He cannot hide the joy in his face as he runs towards the nearest bathroom, anxious to test these pills...
"Holy sh-- What's this??" Wolverine looks surprised at the impressive cylinder labeled Pym particle. It looks like an enlarged cucumber... He grabs the instructions and reads
"This pill will make you grow a couple of feet! Surprise your friends! Amaze your girl! WARNING: DO not cut the particle! It could severely harm the timestream and create a different reality where you are a dwarf called Gimli..."
"What the fu-- how am I supposed to swallow such a pill??"
But Wolverine forgot to read the bottom line of the instructions and as he did so his heart filled with sorrow...
"Not to be taken orally..."
A tear fell from the canucklehead's eye as he read that line and realized what he had to do...
Ouside the bathroom Jean Grey walks by, accompanied by Emma Frost.
"Why are you such a ***** Emma?"
"Who knows! Gamma rays maybe?"
But the girls' chat is ended by a painful scream coming from the bathroom
" AAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAROOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOY IT HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS"
JEan Grey recognizes the scream
"Logan! Is someone attacking you??"
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
WWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNO
OOOOOOOOOOOO!!!DOOO'NNNNNNNT GETTTTTTTTT INNNNNNNNN!!!"
"Ok"
Jean and Emma walk away.
Two days later Wolverine looks taller, yet no one seems to realize, although they seem to realize that he refuses to sit at meals or at any time saying "I'm the best bub, I don't need to sit!" While he carefully rubs his butt.
He kisses Jean now, and she doesn't see that he's not standing up a stool anymore... maybe being tall isn't all that is craked up to be.
And that my friends is why Wolverine looks taller since New X-Men 117
__________________
Sebita
Believe in the x The Clubhouse for Gifted Youngsters
The Great Universe
In the Name of Xavier
------------------
"Are you a god fearing man, senator? It's such an strange phrase. I've always though of god as a teacher... as a bringer of light, wisdom and understanding. You see, i think what you really are afraid of is me. Me and my kind, the Brotherhood of Mutants. Oh, it's not so suprising really, mankind has always feared what it doesnt understand. Well, dont fear god senator, and certainly dont fear me... not anymore."