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New Story

RhettRhett (Not even a monkey)
in Zocalo v2.0
I posted a short start of a story I am writing based off of the AvP world (Aliens vs. Predator). Please check it out and critique.

Link: [url="http://216.15.145.59/mainforums/Forum15/HTML/000035.html"]http://216.15.145.59/mainforums/Forum15/HTML/000035.html[/url]

Comments

  • WHY_oldWHY_old Elite Ranger
    I like where it's going, my only problem is that it's moves a bit too fast for such a short chapter.

    I'm assuming that you wrote this on paper first, and it took up about four pages. but when you type it in, it only seems like a paragraph's worth. I hate when that happens.

    ASnyway, I hope to see more soon.
  • RhettRhett (Not even a monkey)
    The story is actually supposed to be released in parts (combinations of 3 or four chapters) so that is why it is short. Most of my writing I do not do on paper (unless required) because I can type faster than I can write most of the time (and it is a thousand times more legible). I might have to add more to it to flesh it out. Trust me, I have a faily large story arc that I would like to do, lets just see if I can accomplish it...
  • RhettRhett (Not even a monkey)
    I am posting chapter 2 along with an edited Chapter 1. The second chapter is four pages in Word while the first is now about 1 and a half.
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